So I know what you're thinking- at least you have a child. I'm not saying primary infertility isn't a bitch- but it's still just as hard when you want another baby and it just isn't happening. I love Makayla but I never wanted an only child. I have big plans. Four to be exact. Jeff and I have been trying for Number 2 for over a year now. Granted, Jeff was in Afghanistan for a good chunk of the year, but he was home for leave several times. I guess since was Makayla was a surprise baby, I figured it wouldn't be hard to get pregnant again. My body has other plans though.
My cycles have been irregular my whole life, it's one of the reasons we have Makayla. Over the past year it has gotten worse. I had a total of three periods the whole year. I went to the doctor who gave me 10 progesterone pills to jump start my body and it worked- once. When I went back she seemed totally uninterested in figuring out what is wrong with me so I took to diagnosing myself. I had her test my thyroid levels- they came back normal. I got the normal yearly workup- everything seemed fine. I gave up on even going to see her. I've recently come to the realization that I am an exact fit to the symptoms of PCOS (Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome). I've made an appointment to see a new doctor to confirm but it doesn't really matter much. The "treatment" for PCOS is very limited. To regulate the cycles they prescribe birth control. Unless you want to get pregnant. Then you're basically shit out of luck. The treatment there is to lose weight (one of the symptoms of PCOS is unexplained weight gain) and hope your cycle returns when you lose it. Also, they will prescribe clomid to increase the possibility of ovulating. Some data indicates that women with PCOS are "insulin resistant" which means that the insulin in my body is less effective at lowing my blood sugar and leads to weight gain and makes it more difficult to lose weight.
Over the past two months I have been trying to lose weight by reducing my food intake and increasing my activity. I walked with Mom and Vanessa for about a month and lost zero pounds. I started biking and I've been busy building a fence in the sweltering heat and I've gained weight. So I got to thinking about back when I was in college and I went on the Atkins diet. Atkins was all about controlling your blood sugar levels throughout the day by not eating carbohydrates that are quickly broken down into simple sugars and cause blood sugar spikes. I lost a lot of weight on Atkins. So I decided this week, I was done with carbs. I've been feeling really great this week, never hungry and I've found loads of low carb recipes that make me feel like I'm not missing a thing. And I've lost 7 pounds. Now that may be water weight, but I didn't lose anything with the last two things I've tried so it's something.
It's time to take charge. I'm tired of feeling jealous of every woman I know who has announced a pregnancy (or birth) in the last year and a half. Yes, if you've been pregnant, I mean you. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for you and your babies are adorable. That doesn't stop me from being jealous that you have what I so badly want.
Friday, July 27, 2012
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Busy, busy
It's been a busy last couple of weeks for me and I haven't had time to write anything. I've been saving horrible homemade cosmetic products from pinterest left and right so get ready. Or, if you prefer to waste your time and money making petri dish products and poisoning yourself, don't read this blog.
We had a wood chipping extravaganza a couple weekends ago in which we chipped all of the sticks and logs that would fit in a 6 inch industrial chipper at our house and my parents house. We are attempting to clear the future fence line at our house so we can install the new fence. The previous owners of our home really did not like to do any type of yard work or home repair work. They had a boat. Enough said. The next phase is to rent a log splitter so that we can split the hundred or so massive logs left over from tree removal over the years that are piled directly in the path of the fence. Should be a blasty blast!
The garden is doing very well at my parents house. I more than doubled the size of the garden this year with the help of my trusty Cub Cadet Yanmar and implements. We are almost finished with the weeding and the summer squashes and peppers are already producing fruit. I realize most people have been getting squash for a while now but I was three weeks late in planting because I was still working on the expansion. The massive heat wave helped everything shoot right up despite the late start. I ordered wood for the fence around the garden. Woodchucks have been nibbling the zucchinis so that project is high priority. We tried out the PHD last night finally- it works pretty well but being that my parents property is nothing but rocks it's not perfect. When it hits a rock that spans the width of the hole it can't get through it so it looks like I'm still going to have to use the damn breaker bar.
Speaking of the heat wave, we bought and installed a pool last weekend. It's pretty sweet. Dad has been drawing up some plans for a nice deck and fence for safety (and code with the city). It's going to be awesome.
Work has been busy too- Bossman is in China for two weeks right now. Which is nice because I don't have to deal with him but bad because I have to do all of his work too. I had a big success with the reformulation of our Seriously Shine Free matting moisturizer. I have never liked the product as it was because it was billed as "matting" but it really did nothing of the sort. I had to do battle with a few people who wanted me to make it a heavier moisturizer (because a heavy lotion for oily skin makes PERFECT sense) but in the end I did what I wanted and everyone loved it. It's now a weightless matting moisturizer and a stable formula. I've been battling NPD on a regular basis too- mostly because they are way too set in their ways and beliefs about what sells. I get tired of making coral shade strawberry lip glosses. "But strawberry sells!" Maybe that's true but if we never try anything new how will we know if kids want something else? We don't do focus groups so I don't feel like we really understand our target consumer. Shots in the dark. We could do so much better. When it comes to evaluating "new" flavors I have to get comments from the NPD lady, her boss, and her bosses boss. Then, when they all like it, it has to go to the owner's wife who has to like it. If at any point someone doesn't like it then it dies. This is such an inefficient system. They have NPD lady there because she is supposedly the "flavor guru" (even though she doesn't realize that creme brulee does not taste like caramel...). The way it works now though is that we never even try anything that the owner's wife doesn't like. So she hates cherry and mint and honey- so I can never use those flavors. Never mind that there are plenty of people who do like those flavors. Whatever. One day, the guard will change, and hopefully before the company is run to the ground.
So anyway, yeah it's been busy. Back to work!
We had a wood chipping extravaganza a couple weekends ago in which we chipped all of the sticks and logs that would fit in a 6 inch industrial chipper at our house and my parents house. We are attempting to clear the future fence line at our house so we can install the new fence. The previous owners of our home really did not like to do any type of yard work or home repair work. They had a boat. Enough said. The next phase is to rent a log splitter so that we can split the hundred or so massive logs left over from tree removal over the years that are piled directly in the path of the fence. Should be a blasty blast!
The garden is doing very well at my parents house. I more than doubled the size of the garden this year with the help of my trusty Cub Cadet Yanmar and implements. We are almost finished with the weeding and the summer squashes and peppers are already producing fruit. I realize most people have been getting squash for a while now but I was three weeks late in planting because I was still working on the expansion. The massive heat wave helped everything shoot right up despite the late start. I ordered wood for the fence around the garden. Woodchucks have been nibbling the zucchinis so that project is high priority. We tried out the PHD last night finally- it works pretty well but being that my parents property is nothing but rocks it's not perfect. When it hits a rock that spans the width of the hole it can't get through it so it looks like I'm still going to have to use the damn breaker bar.
Speaking of the heat wave, we bought and installed a pool last weekend. It's pretty sweet. Dad has been drawing up some plans for a nice deck and fence for safety (and code with the city). It's going to be awesome.
Work has been busy too- Bossman is in China for two weeks right now. Which is nice because I don't have to deal with him but bad because I have to do all of his work too. I had a big success with the reformulation of our Seriously Shine Free matting moisturizer. I have never liked the product as it was because it was billed as "matting" but it really did nothing of the sort. I had to do battle with a few people who wanted me to make it a heavier moisturizer (because a heavy lotion for oily skin makes PERFECT sense) but in the end I did what I wanted and everyone loved it. It's now a weightless matting moisturizer and a stable formula. I've been battling NPD on a regular basis too- mostly because they are way too set in their ways and beliefs about what sells. I get tired of making coral shade strawberry lip glosses. "But strawberry sells!" Maybe that's true but if we never try anything new how will we know if kids want something else? We don't do focus groups so I don't feel like we really understand our target consumer. Shots in the dark. We could do so much better. When it comes to evaluating "new" flavors I have to get comments from the NPD lady, her boss, and her bosses boss. Then, when they all like it, it has to go to the owner's wife who has to like it. If at any point someone doesn't like it then it dies. This is such an inefficient system. They have NPD lady there because she is supposedly the "flavor guru" (even though she doesn't realize that creme brulee does not taste like caramel...). The way it works now though is that we never even try anything that the owner's wife doesn't like. So she hates cherry and mint and honey- so I can never use those flavors. Never mind that there are plenty of people who do like those flavors. Whatever. One day, the guard will change, and hopefully before the company is run to the ground.
So anyway, yeah it's been busy. Back to work!
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